“For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”

Paul’s words declare what all of us know to be true instinctively. Something about this world of ours is lacking. There is something missing, something off, something not quite right.

No amount of “stuff” can alleviate the unreachable itch. We look at the contents of our lives and we know that things aren’t as they should be.

Paul commends his audience to grow in love, for that is the way in which the divine purpose is revealed to us. What Paul knows, he only knows in part, but a time will come when he (and ourselves) will “know” fully all of God’s plan for those whom he has created.

Within this mystery, there is the joy of being “fully known.”

Socrates taught us to “know thyself.” But even this is difficult. We struggle to understand what makes us react, think, behave the way we sometimes do.

In the movie “Good Will Hunting” Sean (the counselor) tells Will that:

No one can possibly understand the depths of you.

No matter how hard Sean may try, Will’s experiences are uniquely his. If we struggle to understand the depths of ourselves, it is very unlikely that another individual can fully comprehend our inner world.

We all desire to be “known,” however – To be understood.

What it means to be fully known is that God has seen and does see the depths of who we are and loves us. In him we:

…live and move and have our being.

To strive to know Christ and the law of his love is to know ourselves.

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,

James’ advice will leave us in far better shape than if we were slow to listen, quick to speak  and quick to become angry. The problem is DOING what James says tends to be very unnatural to us.

When James writes these words it’s not simply a command. It is something that we become, and the process by which we become good listeners, cautious speakers, and have control of our impulses is entirely up to us.

One way to control our anger and become better listeners is to understand what hinders us from doing so.

Consider while in a conversation what it is that you want from your listener. What is it that motivates you to speak your words? If you are seeking affirmation or approval of some sort, you will inevitably steer the conversation back to yourself. My guess is if your listener doesn’t give you the affirmation you seek you’ll become agitated with them.

Consider listening to be a gift to whomever you’re conversing with. Ask clarifying questions – nod your head to demonstrate that you’re listening – and do not interrupt them. This is WAY harder than it sounds, but give it a try.

If you are a person who is quick to become angry, consider whether or not it is the immediate situation that angers you or that the compounding of emotions, events, and triggers are not making for exaggerated responses to any given situation. If the latter is the case then it’s important you take a personal inventory. What were you thinking about leading up to an outburst? What were you thinking about after? One of the most difficult things to do is to be self-aware to this extent.

But if your own words and actions sometimes surprise you, remember that:

Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks – Jesus

Blessings to you this day as you seek to become better listeners, conscientiousness speakers, and less temperamental.

“It is God’s Kindness that draws us to repentance”

I had a professor whose teaching style made me feel terribly small… I should restate that. People only have power over us if we give it to them.

So a better way to say it is:

 ”The professors teaching style awoke my own feelings of inadequacy and smallness.”

While on a trip with this professor I picked him up and tossed him into a body of water. I wanted him to feel small – the way I did.

How did this professor react? Well, he didn’t. That’s why I’m telling you this story. There was no exchange of tit-for-tat. No reprimand. No rebuke. Not even an acknowledgement of what happened.

He was nothing but kind. He forgave me when I asked for it. He forgave me again when I tried to make light of it.

Even in telling the story now I cringe. But why?

I would feel much better if he got angry with me. I would feel much better if he fought me, called me names, told me where I could go and what I could do to myself.

Instead he was kind. Instead he was forgiving.

All I want(ed) was to pay for what I had done. I wanted to offer some form of reparation to make it alright. Instead I was on the receiving end of Christ’s teaching:

“Do not repay evil for evil.”

“Do not resist an evil person.”

“Bless those who curse you.”

And meeting Christ in this situation held up a mirror. I don’t always like what I see in the mirror, especially when I see it with such clarity.

God changes us by being kind to us, by giving of himself through his Son, Jesus Christ… and it makes us uncomfortable. It causes us great distress because in seeing who he is we come to see who we are.  Who we REALLY are. And he loves us – so fully – so completely – so undeservingly.

Honestly, when I think of his love for me, I want to push him away. I want him to make me pay for my guilt, for my deeds – and instead I am met by his loving Son.

We must accept his kindness. We must not hide from him as a ancestors did in the garden when they realized their shame. We must welcome the embrace that he extends to us, over and over again – for it is his kindness which draws us to repentance.